she woke up with a sticky ear
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
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