i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
