He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
Randomize