yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
Randomize
