So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
