But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
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