if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
Are these your boobs on my camera?
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize