You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Randomize
