i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
Remember that St. Patrick's Day when I fucked your married coworker in his truck and the whole bar was chanting for you "Don't fuck Mike"?! #TheLuckOfTheIrish 🍀
That was before I lit my hair on fire
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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