Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
Randomize
