I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
Randomize
