the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
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