and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
