Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
Holy shit, Uber is testing a service to summon an ice cream truck.
Bring me the penis of the founder so I may endlessly fellate him. Or cunnalinge. I don't discriminate.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Randomize
