it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
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