i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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