guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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