Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.