i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
accomplished twins. life is a go
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Randomize
