Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
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