So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
Randomize