Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
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