clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
