I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
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