It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
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