We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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