I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Randomize
