Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
