the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
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had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
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Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
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