You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
