i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Randomize
