i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Randomize
