Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
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