handjob tips. give me some.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
Randomize