So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
