I cockslap morals
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
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