Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
Randomize
