Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
she told me i tasted like america
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize
