careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
Randomize
