So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
This is classic penis vs brain.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
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