i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
Randomize
