just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
Randomize
