I must be too annoying 4 u.
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
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