do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
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