if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
Still dying that you shit outside
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
Randomize
