drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
