I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize