i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize
