Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
Randomize