my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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