her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
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